I owe this to meditation.
The part of mind that is at the ready to fill up empty space, the default brain, thinking or fearing, or figuring out, or internal rumination, the idle mode of the brain which is not in gear but is looking for something to fill space.
Idle mind. There is a time and place for that. I’m guessing. Otherwise, why would it be so prevalent?
Every time I catch myself in idle mind, ruminating mind, self-hate mind that is success. The idle mind is default mode, it is the mode of non-focused mind.
What is idle mind thinking about? Success. Conscious mind.
What is self-hate mind thinking about? Success. Conscious mind.
What is the ruminating mind ruminating on? Success Conscious mind.
To say the ruminating mind is a failure, though, is incorrect.
When I catch myself in the ruminating that is a success, though, that is a success. That makes me more conscious. That develops self more. That helps me to shape my narrative.
The ruminating mind is not a failure. If it were, than being conscious all the time would be my goal. I am not that bold or audacious.
To expect to be conscious ALL the time. To set a goal of being conscious all the time. That mind set in itself is failed perspective. Black and White. All or nothing. Even knowing that I’ll fail and accept that knowing is not a brain cycle that I want to entertain.
The process of catching myself in the idle mind, of letting that go off leash, drag me to all ends of whatever smell is out there, that is all the success I am after now. To see where that leads me.
How Failure is Success in the Art of Becoming, makes catchy title. That is all.